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WIT & WISDOM - November 5, 1998 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: When we learn to say a deep, passionate yes to the things that really matter. . . then peace begins to settle onto our lives like golden sunlight sifting to a forest floor. - Thomas Kinkade [1] ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: If indeed there had been anything better and more profitable to the health of men than to suffer, Christ would surely have shown it by word and example. - Thomas a Kempis [2] ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: THE TOP TEN REASONS MEN SHOULD JOIN THE CHURCH CHOIR 10. Rehearsals are every Wednesday night. Which means that for those few hours, you will significantly reduce your risk of contracting tendinitis from nonstop operation of a television remote control or computer mouse. 9. Because you wear a choir robe every Sunday, you are liberated from a task many men find quite challenging: finding clothes that match properly. 8. From your special vantage point every Sunday, in which you look out at the entire congregation from the choir seats, you will develop interesting new hobbies. Among these is a little guessing game called "Who's Praying, Who's Sleeping?" 7. On the other hand, sitting in full view of 400-500 people on a weekly basis makes it much less likely that you yourself will give in to a chronic lack of sleep. Although it has been known to happen. 6. If you think your singing in the shower sounds good now, just wait till you've been singing with us for a few weeks. 5. Singing in a choir is one of the few activities for men that does not require electronics equipment or expensive power tools. This could be good for the family budget. 4. For the fitness buffs, singing in the Choir is not only heart healthy, it's soul healthy. But there are no monthly membership fees, and it's a lot easier on the knees than jogging. 3. If you think you've done everything there is to do, and there are no great challenges left in life, try singing with us guys and staying on pitch. 2. Choir rehearsal lasts half as long as a professional football game, but is at least twice as satisfying. This is especially true if you are a long-suffering fan of the Miami Dolphins. (Don't worry, though, the rehearsals are on Wednesday, not Monday Nights.) AND THE NUMBER 1 REASON MEN SHOULD JOIN THE CHOIR: When people ask you whether you've been behaving yourself, you can say with the utmost sincerity, "Hey, I'm a Choir Boy." [3] ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts: "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?" The man below says: "Yes, you're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field." "You must work in Information Technology" says the balloonist. "I do" replies the man. "How did you know." "Well" says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but it's no use to anyone." The man below says "you must work in business." "I do" replies the balloonist, "but how did you know?" "Well", says the man, "you don't know where you are, or where you're going, but you expect me to be able to help. You're in the same position you were before we met, but now it's my fault." [4] ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: A Harvard University research study involved two groups of 100 Harvard graduates between the ages of sixty-five and seventy-five. The first group retired at age sixty-five while the other group continued to be employed for another ten years. In the first group - those who retired at sixty-five - seven out of eight were dead by age seventy-five. In the second group of 100 men who continued to work - only one out of eight was deceased by age seventy-five. - Gordon Botting, "The Stew Pot", April 1998 ~~~~~~~ CONTRIBUTORS: [1] ("This and That" [2] (Christian Quotation of the Day [3] (Carl Gustafson via MONDAY FODDER [4] (Daily Smile |