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~~~~~~~ WIT and WISDOM - March 11, 1999 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: When just being together is more important than what you do. . . you are with a friend. (E-zine: THIS AND THAT Mailto:milady@mediaone.net) ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: Next to the wicked lives of men, nothing is so great a disparagement and weakening to religion as the divisions of Christians. - John Tillotson (1630-1694) (Christian Quotation of the Day ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: A woman was at work when she received a phone call that her daughter was very sick with a fever. She left her work and stopped by the pharmacy to get some medication for her daughter. When returning to her car she found that she had locked her keys in the car. She was in a hurry to get home to her sick daughter, she didn't know what to do, so she called her home and told the baby sitter what had happened and that she did not know what to do. The baby sitter told her that her daughter was getting worse. She said, "You might find a coat hanger and use that to open the door". The woman looked around and found an old rusty coat hanger that had been thrown down on the ground possibly by someone else who at some time or other had locked their keys in their car. Then she looked at the hanger and said, "I don't know how to use this." So she bowed her head and asked God to send her some help. Within five minutes an old rusty car pulled up, with a dirty, greasy, bearded man who was wearing an old biker skull rag on his head. The woman thought, "Great God. This is what you sent to help me????" But, she was desperate, so she was also very thankful. The man got out of his car and asked her if he could help. She said "Yes, my daughter is very sick. . . I stopped to get her some medication and I locked my keys in my car, I must get home to her. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car." He said, "SURE". He walked over to the car, and in less than one minute the car was opened. She hugged the man and through her tears she said, "THANK YOU SO MUCH. . . You are a very nice man." The man replied, "Lady, I am not a nice man. I just got out of prison today. I was in prison for car theft and have only been out for about an hour." The woman hugged the man again and with sobbing tears cried out loud. . . "THANK YOU, GOD, FOR SENDING ME A PROFESSIONAL." (George Haig) ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: Teenager with nose rings, baggy clothing and spiked hair to a friend: "I don't really LIKE dressing this way, but it keeps my parents from dragging me everywhere they go." (E-zine: FAST EDDIE'S FUNNIES http://recommend-it.com/l.z.e?s=154533) ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: DID YOU KNOW THIS ABOUT THESE CREATURES? The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight. The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds, that makes the catfish rank #1 for animal having the most taste buds. The flea can jump 350 times its body length, that is like a human jumping the length of a football field. Butterflies taste with their feet. (E-zine: GOBBLER GROUP http://www.onelist.com/subscribe.cgi/Gobbler_Group) |