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WITandWISDOM(tm) - August 16, 1999 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: In the book, "Finding Hope Again," Roy Fairchild told how he had come to Vienna after a two-week illness in a small Austrian village. He had spent most of his money on medical costs and his last cent to take a train to Vienna to try and find his friends he had been traveling with. As he was standing in one of the street car stations in the center of the city, tired, hungry and discouraged a little old wrinkled lady, one of the ladies whose job was to sweep out the station, came to him and asked him if he were hungry. Before he could answer she took her own lunch from a brown paper bag and offered him half of it. He said he was so moved by her action that he has never forgotten her face or her kindness and the sparkle in her eye. They talked for more than an hour about her life. She was raised in the country on a farm knowing only hard work. Since then she had lost her husband and two sons in the Resistance. Only her daughter had survived but she said that she was very thankful for many things. When asking her why she offered him half her lunch the lady simply said, "Jesu ist mein Herr. Gott ist gut (Jesus is my Lord. God is good)". (E-zine: DAILY ENCOUNTER http://www.actsweb.org/encounter.htm) ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: TRAVEL TIPS FOR MEXICO These tips were included in a letter from a short-term missionary to Mexico. 1. I let my wife carry all my money, except my bus fare if I need it. That way I can honestly say, "I don't have any money" when the street kids come begging. 2. In the marketplace, carry a few pesos in one pocket, with the rest distributed in other places. It's always best to look like you don't have enough money when trying to bargain. 3. Always carry toilet paper. If the public restrooms are clean, tip the attendant one peso. If there's no seat, wipe the rim and balance. 4. Brake lights and turn signals are optional. 5. It is required to periodically test your horn. 6. A blinking turn signal simply means that it is working today. 7. "Manana" (tomorrow) does not mean tomorrow. It means "not today." When tomorrow arrives, it still means "not today." 8. "Right now" means sometime later today. 9. When handling your chili peppers, don't pick your nose. 10. When eating, remember that whatever burns going in, will also burn as it goes out. 11. The newspaper in the bathroom is not for your reading pleasure (see #3). 12. When driving at night, remember that cows and people do not have tail lights. 13. If it's bigger and uglier, it has the right of way. (Cars and trucks, silly, not the women!) (E- zine: Bill & Jo's Humor & Inspiration w/picture backgrounds Mailto:billnjok@olypen.com) ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: Operator ? or Information ? "Information? I need the number of the Caseway Insurance Company in Gujrat, India." "Would you spell that, please?" "Certainly. C as in sea. A as in aye. S as in sea. E as in eye. W as in why. A as in are. Y as in you." The operator pauses. "Just a minute, sir. I'll connect you with my supervisor . . ." Joke Compilation Copyright© Sandy S. Davenport 1999; Permission granted to forward, post on sites or submit to other lists ONLY if this notice is fully included. (E-zine: Pakistani Jokes© Mailto:Pakistani-Jokeslist-subscribe@onelist.com) ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: Some years ago a shoe manufacturer ran an ad on slippers. The headline under the picture of the slippers read: Keeps feet from getting cold." The ad was a flop. Then the ad manager changed the headline to read: "Keeps feet warm and comfortable." Sales picked up immediately. - Bits & Pieces, May 27, 1993 (Magazine: BITS & PIECES http://www.epinc.com/) |