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WITandWISDOM(tm) - October 4, 1999 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: "Let us realize that: the privilege to work is a gift, the power to work is a blessing, the love of work is success!" - David O. McKay (E-zine: THE MOTIVATION MAILER Mailto:overcomeunlimited-unsubscribe@listbot.com) ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: One of the pitfalls people over 40 fall into is thinking that it's too late. It's an old cliche but the simple fact is that it's rarely too late for anything. Some years ago a man over 60 was offered nearly $200,000 for a restaurant-motel-service station business that he'd spent his life building up. He turned the offer down because he loved the business and wasn't ready to retire yet. Two years later, at age 65, he was flat broke with no income to look forward to but a small Social Security check each month. The state had built a new highway bypassing his business and he lost it. Most people would have been crushed by such a blow, but he refused to give up. Instead, he took stock. There was one thing he knew how to do - fry chicken. Maybe he could sell that knowledge to others. He kissed his wife good-bye and in a battered old car, with a pressure cooker and a can of specially prepared flour, set out to sell his idea to other restaurants. It was tough going and he often slept in the car because there wasn't enough money for a hotel room. A few years later he had built a nation-wide franchised restaurant chain called Kentucky Fried Chicken. The man was Colonel Sanders. - Bits & Pieces (Magazine: BITS & PIECES http://www.epinc.com/ ) ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: THEY SAID IT IN COURT! :o) Part 1 of 4 [Oct 4, 11, 18, 25] Next to the strange things you may have said on your first date, comes the comments said in court. Q: Was that the same nose you broke as a child? Q: Now, doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn't know anything about it until the next morning? Q: What happened then? A: He told me, he says, 'I have to kill you because you can identify me.' Q: Did he kill you? Q: Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war? Q: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he? Q: Were you alone or by yourself? Q: How long have you been a French Canadian? Q: Do you have any children or anything of that kind? Q: I show you exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture? A: That's me. Q: Were you present when that picture was taken? Q: Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in? Q: Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated? A: By death Q: And by whose death was it terminated? Q: Mrs. Jones, do you believe you are emotionally stable? A: I used to be. Q: How many times have you committed suicide? Q: So you were gone until you returned? Q: She had three children, right? A: Yes. Q: How many were boys? A: None. Q: Were there girls? Q: You don't know what it was, and you didn't know what it looked like, but can you describe it? Q: You say that the stairs went down to the basement? A: Yes. Q: And these stairs, did they go up also? Q: Have you lived in this town all your life? A: Not yet. A Texas attorney, realizing he was on the verge of unleashing a stupid question, interrupted himself and said, "Your Honor, I'd like to strike the next question." (Heidi Webber) ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: The story is told of Franklin Roosevelt, who often endured long receiving lines at the White House. He complained that no one really paid any attention to what was said. One day, during a reception, he decided to try an experiment. To each person who came down the line and shook his hand, he murmured, "I murdered my grandmother this morning." The guests responded with phrases like, "Marvelous! Keep up the good work. We are proud of you. God bless you, sir." It was not until the end of the line, while greeting the ambassador from Bolivia, that his words were actually heard. Not quite knowing what to say, the ambassador leaned over and whispered, "I'm sure she had it coming." (E-zine: HUMORG Mailto:Judib@kktv.com) ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: What plant shoots its seeds out at high speed? . . . The squirting cucumber, Ecballium elaterium, shoots its seeds from the fruit at more than sixty miles per hour (97 km/hr). The seeds can land thirty feet away (9 meters). As the squirting cucumber fruit ripens, the parent vine squeezes water into the fruit, and the pressure inside steadily increases. When the fruit is ripe, a special end-cap suddenly pops open and a stream of seeds and liquid shoots out explosively, spreading seeds far from the parent plant. The liquid portion of the ejected stream can be collected and dried into a flaky material called elaterium, which has medicinal properties. More about the squirting cucumber: http://www.botanical.com/botanical/mgmh/c/cucus124.html Drawing that shows how the fruit squirts: http://chili.rt66.com/hrbmoore/Illustrations/Ecballium_elaterium.gif (E-zine: THE LEARNING KINGDOM http://www.tlk-lists.com/join/ ) |