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WITandWISDOM(tm) - November 9, 1999 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: The real fault is to have faults and not try to mend them. - Confucius - Bits & Pieces, August 19,1993 (Magazine: BITS & PIECES http://www.epinc.com/) ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: THINGS CHILDREN SAY & DO: A preacher was telling his Bible class the story of the Prodigal Son and wishing to emphasize the disagreeable attitude of the elder brother on that occasion, he laid especial stress on this phrase of the parable. After describing the rejoicing of the household over the return of the wayward son, he spoke of one who, in the midst of the festivities, failed to share in the jubilant spirit of the occasion. "Can anybody in the class," he asked, "tell me who this was?" A small boy, who had been listening sympathetically to the story, put up his hand. "I know," he said beamingly. "It was the fatted calf." (E-zine: SERMON FODDER http://www.onelist.com/subscribe.cgi/Sermon_Fodder) ~~~~~~ A little girl who had just been promoted to the fourth grade wept on the shoulder of her beloved third grade teacher. "Oh, Miss Young," she sobbed, "why aren't you smart enough to teach me again this year?!" (E-zine: DIVERSIONS DIGEST http://www.worldstart.com/diversions.htm) ~~~~~~ Jamie, a four-year old, had just applied her mother's fingernail polish to her fingernails plus many other places on her hands and in mother's bedroom. A not too happy mother had sent her to the bathroom to wait until the mess in the bedroom was cleaned up. When mother returned to the bathroom, she heard her daughter praying: "Help God! Help! Forgive me for my sins and save me. And you'd better do it real quick because my mother is about to kill me!" From Daily Encounter (c) Dick Innes 1999 (E-zine: DAILY ENCOUNTER http://www.actsweb.org/subscribe.htm ) ~~~~~~ A father and his son were looking at a Nativity scene in a London gallery. It was Titian's world-famous painting of the scene at Bethlehem. The boy asked; "Dad, why is the baby lying in such a cruddy cradle in a pile of straw?" "Well, son," explained the father, "they were poor and they couldn't afford anything better." Said the boy: "Then how come they could afford to have their picture painted by such an expensive artist?" (E-zine: SERMON FODDER http://www.onelist.com/subscribe.cgi/Sermon_Fodder) ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: While driving in Pennsylvania, a family caught up to an Amish carriage. The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor, because attached to the back of the carriage was a hand printed sign . . . "Energy efficient vehicle. Runs on oats and grass. Caution: Do not step on exhaust." (E-zine: THE FUNNIES Mailto:andychaps_the-funnies- subscribe@egroups.com) ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: Why is some china called "bone" china? . . . Some china is called "bone" china because some powdered animal bone is mixed in with the clay used to make this china: it gives the china a special kind of strength, whiteness, and translucency. (E-zine: GAGLER'S TRIVIA OF THE DAY Mailto:signuptrivia@gagler.com) |