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WITandWISDOM(tm) - July 18, 2000 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: That government is best which governs the least, because its people discipline themselves. -Thomas Jefferson Source: Quote A Day, quoteaday-subscribe@listbot.com via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: At the University of Chicago Divinity School each year they have what is called "Baptist Day". It is a day when all the Baptists in the area are invited to the school because they want the Baptist dollars to keep coming in. On this day each one is to bring a lunch to be eaten outdoors in a grassy picnic area. Every "Baptist Day" the school would invite one of the greatest minds to lecture in the theological education center. One year they invited Dr. Paul Tillich. Dr. Tillich spoke for two and one-half hours proving that the resurrection of Jesus was false. He quoted scholar after scholar and book after book. He concluded that since there was no such thing as the historical resurrection, the religious tradition of the church was groundless, emotional mumbo-jumbo, because it was based on a relationship with a risen Jesus, who, in fact, never rose from the dead in any literal sense. He then asked if there were any questions. After about 30 seconds an old, dark-skinned preacher with a head of short-cropped, woolly white hair stood up in the back of the auditorium. "Docta Tillich, I got one question," he said as all eyes turned toward him. He reached into his sack lunch and pulled out an apple and began eating it. "Docta Tillich . . . CRUNCH, MUNCH My question is a simple question, . . . CRUNCH, MUNCH . . . Now, I ain't never read them books you read . . . CRUNCH, MUNCH . . . and I can't recite the Scriptures in the original Greek. CRUNCH, MUNCH . . . I don't know nothin' about Niebuhr and Heidegger . . . CRUNCH, MUNCH. . . He finished the apple. "All I wanna know is: This apple I just ate, - was it bitter or sweet?" Dr. Tillich paused for a moment and answered in exemplary scholarly fashion: "I cannot possibly answer that question, for I haven't tasted your apple." The white-haired preacher dropped the core of his apple into his crumpled paper bag, looked up at Dr. Tillich and said calmly, "Neither have you tasted my Jesus." The 1,000 plus in attendance could not contain themselves. The auditorium erupted with applause and cheers. Dr. Tillich thanked his audience and promptly left the platform. Shared by: Alex Hines via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: THINGS CHILDREN SAY & DO: My wife and two children and I were headed out for a picnic for the Easter Monday Holiday (Australia). Samuel, my 2 and a half year old, said "look its the veever! (river) and my wife said, "no Sam, its just a path." To which he said, "yeah, its the path!" So I said, "Sam, is it a psycho-path or a "Socio-Path" thinking I would cause him a moment's confusion. Not so, without hesitation, he shot back, "No, it's a stroller-path." By Jonathan Burchard, Perth, Western Australia via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~ Driving along, with my 7-year-old daughter in the front seat. She says, "Daddy, when I grow up I want to be a vegetarian." I reply, "A what?" "You know, the doctor that takes care of animals." By Don Stevens Source: Keith's Mostly Clean Humor, McHawList-subscribe@onelist.com via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~ Eric (my two year old son) and I talk while I am driving. He was sitting in his carseat and we were having a normal chat when he noticed the moon was out. He said "God made the moon." I replied "Yes, He did." Then he said. "God made the stars, too. God made everything." "Yes, you're right." After a thoughtful pause Eric said "God must have a really big screwdriver!" Source: Jo Jokers, jo-jokers- subscribe@egroups.com via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~ After four members of my family turned 40, we found out how much the kids had picked up on their trepidation. The day before my niece's ninth birthday, she observed, "Tomorrow I'll be nine, and next year it's the big one-oh." - By Deborah Shapiro Source: Reader's Digest, Copyright (c), www.readersdigest.com via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: "Men are like wine - some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age." - Pope John XXIII "Age is a question of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter. " - Satchel Paige Source: Bill's Punch Line, bills-punch-line- subscribe@onelist.com via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: Why do some US coins have notched edges? . . . United States dimes, quarters, and half dollars have notches all around their edges, but pennies and nickels have no notches. Notches are a remnant from days when the value of a coin was determined by the amount of silver or gold it contained. The US mint incorporated the notches as a way of discouraging people from shaving off small amounts of the precious metals from their coins. Less valuable coins have always contained only cheaper metals, and so their smooth edges were allowed to remain. Although coins today no longer contain silver, the notches have been kept as part of their design, and are useful for recognition by the visually impaired. More about United States coins: http://www.ustreas.gov/opc/opc0033.html Source: The Learning Kingdom, Copyright (c) 2000, www.tlk-lists.com/join/ via http://www.witandwisdom.org Submitted by: Carol Blum |