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WITandWISDOM(tm) - August 21, 2000 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: "Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." - Thomas Edison Source: Inspiration A Day!, inspiration_a_day-subscribe@listbot.com via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: I traveled the world over to see what I could see and was awestruck with God's wonders. I was so touched by his awesome love for me - that he included me in his world - that I wanted to make a difference in it. So I prayed, "Dear God, what can I do to leave a little mark so I can be remembered?" While impatiently waiting for God's reply, I carved my name in the sand, only to have it washed away by the waves. I climbed the highest mountain that I could see and carved my name in stone, only to have it swept away by the wind. Then God's answer came to me and he said, "Carve your name in the hearts of men and you will be remembered forever." By George Hansel Source: Monday Fodder dgaufaaa@iohk.com?subject=Subscribe_Monday_Fodder via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: GOLF DEFINED GOLF, n. 1. A game that consists of a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic. 2. A game of opposites - the world's slowest people are ahead of you, and the fastest are behind. 3. A colorful sport that keeps you on the green, in the pink, and financially in the red. 4. A game which is allowed to be played on Sunday (under blue laws) because it was not considered a game by the law, but a form of moral effort. 5. A game a lot like taxation - you drive hard to get to the green, and then you find yourself in a hole. GOLF CART, n. 1. A popular mode of transportation because, unlike a caddie, it can neither count, criticize, nor snicker. GOLFER, n. 1. A person who yells "fore," takes six, and puts down five; 2. A guy who has the advantage over a fisherman - he doesn't have to bring home anything when he brags he had a great day. Source: Clean Laugh, cleanlaugh-subscribe@egroups.com via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: In the aftermath of the AOL/Time-Warner merger, it has been leaked that Yahoo! is taking over the following companies: Disney Data General United Health Care. The names of the new mega company will be: ~~Hoo-Dis, ~~Hoo-Dat, and ~~Hoo-Cares Source: The Funnies, andychaps_the-funnies-subscribe@egroups.com via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: What's in toothpaste, and how does it work? . . . It's amazing what people will put in their mouths. C'mon, admit it: you never read the label on that stuff you stick in your mouth twice a day. How did you come to have such a high trust level? Whatever is in your toothpaste, it has to be better than what 19th century tooth powder contained. How does porcelain, smashed coral, or cuttlefish bone strike you? Their purpose was to serve as an abrasive to scrub the foreign particles from teeth. Modern pastes clean and polish by substituting ingredients such as silica, chalk, or aluminum oxide (also found in cement). The foam comes from a touch of detergent. Add substances to color the mix, others to improve the taste and consistency, and fluoride to keep your friendly dentist at bay, and you have toothpaste. From: HOW IN THE WORLD Source: MailBits.com Copyright (c) 1998-2000. All rights reserved. trivia-subscribe@mailbits.com via http://www.witandwisdom.org |