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WITandWISDOM(tm) - August 2, 2001 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: Faults are thick when love is thin. - Author Unknown Source: Dave's Daily Chuckle, http://www.Daily-Chuckle.com ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: A small sailing vessel was wrecked of the coast of Ireland. The life-saving crew went out and took off all that they saw; but when they were leaving the wreck, they looked back and saw one poor fellow clinging to a spar, whom they had overlooked. Some asked, "Shall we go and get him?" Others said: "No, we cannot do it. We should be dashed onto the rocks by the fury of the waves, and all perish. Better to lose one than all." When they landed, one young man said, "If somebody will go with me, I will go and get the man on the wreck." His mother was there, and she put her arm around his neck, and said: "Don't go. Stay with your mother. Your father was a sailor, and was lost at sea. Your brother William went to sea years ago, and you know we have never heard from him. And now if you go and perish, I shall be alone." But he kissed his mother, and said, "Mother, I am going after the man on the wreck." Then he and the one who volunteered to go with him got into the boat, and went out through the darkness, the fog, and the roar of the breakers. The people on the shore watched and waited long, peering into the fog. By and by they saw a boat coming, trying to make the shore. After a while, it came near enough that the people on shore called. They said, "Did you get the other man?" The young man replied, "Yes, I got him; and tell mother I got my brother William." He went and found his lost brother. That is your work and mine. There are many Brother Williams that are wrecked. May God help us to get them, and bring them safe to the haven of rest. By George B. Thompson Source: Signs of the Times, Copyright (c) June 19, 1917, Pacific Press, http://www.pacificpress.com/signs Submitted by Dale Galusha ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: HOW TO BUILD A WEB PAGE IN 25 STEPS 1. Download a piece of Web authoring software ~ 20 minutes. 2. Think about what you want to write on your Web page ~ 6 weeks. 3. Download the same piece of Web authoring software, because they have released 3 new versions since the first time you downloaded it ~ 20 minutes. 4. Decide to just steal some images and awards to put on your site ~ 1 minute. 5. Visit sites to find images and awards, find 5 of them that you like ~ 4 days. 6. Run setup of your Web authoring software. After it fails, download it again ~ 25 minutes. 7. Run setup again, boot the software, click all toolbar buttons to see what they do ~ 15 minutes. 8. View the source of others' pages, steal some, change a few words here and there ~ 4 hours. 9. Preview your Web page using the Web Authoring software ~ 1 minute. 10. Try to horizontally line up two related images ~ 6 hours. 11. Remove one of the images ~ 10 seconds. 12. Set the text's font color to the same color as your background, wonder why all your text is gone ~ 4 hours. 13. Download a counter from your ISP ~ 4 minutes. 14. Try to figure out why your counter reads "You are visitor number 16.3 E10" ~ 3 hours. 15. Put 4 blank lines between two lines of text ~ 8 hours. 16. Fine-tune the text, then prepare to load your Web page on your ISP ~ 40 minutes. 17. Accidentally delete your complete web page ~ 1 second. 18. Recreate your web page ~ 2 days. 19. Try to figure out how to load your Web page onto your ISP's server ~ 3 weeks. 20. Call a patient friend to find out about FTP ~ 30 minutes. 21. Download FTP software ~ 10 minutes. 22. Call your friend again ~ 15 minutes. 23. Upload your web page to your ISP's server ~ 10 minutes. 24. Connect to your site on the web ~ 1 minute. 25. Repeat any and all of the previous steps ~ eternity Source: Web Evangelism, http://www.gospelcom.net/guide/web- evangelism.html#web ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: A grandmother was giving directions to her grown grandson who was coming to visit with his wife: "You come to the front door of the apartment complex. I am in apartment 14T. There is a big panel at the door. With your elbow push button 14T. I will buzz you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow hit 14. When you get out I am on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell." "Grandma, that sounds easy, but why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?" the grandson asked. "You're coming empty handed?" Submitted by ;o) Kimberley Broyles ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: The National Industrial Bicycle Company in Japan makes totally customized bicycles. They have 18 million different kinds of bikes they can make in lot sizes of one. They make to order. You go into a store in Tokyo, they fit you, measure you, you pick the handlebars you want, you pick the tires and the color and so forth, and two weeks later they deliver a bike. They used to deliver the bike three days later. It's made that very night, it takes a day and a half for the paint to dry, and they used to deliver a made-to-order bike three days after the customer was in the store. But they stopped doing that because customers didn't believe that the bikes were customized. By Don Peppers, President of Marketing 1:1, a Stamford, Conn., consulting firm Source: Bits & Pieces, April 25, 1996, Copyright (c) Economic Press, Inc., http://www.epinc.com |