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WITandWISDOM(tm) - March 7, 2003 ISSN 1538-8794 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: "A great obstacle to happiness is to expect too much happiness." - Fontenelle Source: Bill's Punch Line, http://www.tcmr.com/billspunchline.html ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: A member of his congregation told Rev. Warren J. Keating, pastor of First Presbyterian Church, Yuma, AZ, that this was the best prayer he ever heard: "Dear God, please help me be the person my dog thinks I am." Source: Holy Humor: A Book of Inspirational Wit and Cartoons, By Samra, Cal (editor); Samra, Rose (editor), Published by Thomas Nelson (Mar 1, 1997), ISBN: 0785271902, http://isbn.nu/0785271902 ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: Car Ads -- If the ad claims... It really means: - rough condition... too bad to lie about - parts car... beyond repair - immaculate... recently washed - engine quiet... if you use 90-weight oil - needs minor overhaul... needs engine - needs major overhaul... Phone the junkyard - burns no oil... (it all leaks out) - Drive it away... I live on a hill. - Drive it anywhere... (within 10 miles) - desirable classic... No one wants it. - rare classic... No one wanted it even when it was new. - stored 20 years... (in a farmer's field) - ran when stored... Won't start. Source: Sunday Funnies, http://www.net153.com/best.htm ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: I heard a story recently about a young girl who wrote a letter to a missionary to let him know that her class had been praying for him. But evidently she'd been told not to request a response to her letter because the missionaries were very busy. So the missionary got a kick out of her letter. It said, "Dear Mr. Missionary, we are praying for you. But we are not expecting an answer." Source: Tidbits Daily Devotional, mailto:tidbits-subscribe@MyInJesus.com ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: Who writes "Dear Abby" now? "Dear Abby" is now written by Jeanne Phillips, the daughter of Pauline Phillips, or "Abigail Van Buren." Until recently, the mother-daughter duo were writing the column together and had been sharing the writing since 1987. Jeanne began taking sole credit in 2002. The original "Abby" has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease, the family revealed last year. You can read "Dear Abby" on the Internet at: http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/viewda.cfm Source: DailyInBox: Trivia, http://your.dailyinbox.com/trivia/ |