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WITandWISDOM(tm) - February 10, 2004 ISSN 1538-8794 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: If nature has made you a giver, your hands are born open, and so is your heart. And though there may be times when your hands are empty, your heart is always full, and you can give things out of that. - Frances Hodgson Burnett, "A Little Princess" ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: An army chaplain was crossing a battlefield. He saw a wounded soldier lying on the ground, and bending over him, asked if he might read to him from the Bible. "I am so thirsty," the wounded man replied. "I would much rather have a drink of water." The chaplain hastened away, soon returning with the water. "Now could you put something under my head?" The chaplain rolled his light overcoat into a pillow. Carefully he lifted the head, placing the improvised pillow under it. "I am so cold," the soldier told him. "If I could only have something over me." The chaplain took off his coat. As he covered the man with it, the soldier said, "If there is a word in the Bible that makes one do for another all you have done for me, I want to hear it." By Inez Brasier, The Watchman Magazine, February 1943 ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: Signs You've Bought a Lemon of a Car Your tinted windows are also known as Hefty Garbage Bags. The car reaches its optimum speed when going downhill. The hi-tech stereo system often requires a new needle. The rear-view mirror says, "Objects in Mirror Are Better Than This Piece of Junk." The odometer on the dashboard is not as sophisticated as the everyday abacus. Traffic Watch warns other drivers what highway you're taking. The sticker on the windshield says, "Batteries Not Included." You fill up the tank with Unleaded Coals. You can only go to restaurants that offer Valet Pushing. When you approach hitchhikers, they put their thumbs down. Source: The Funnies, http://groups.yahoo.com/group/andychaps_the-funnies ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: Some people are pessimists, they think the glass is half empty. Some people are optimists, they think the glass is half full. I am a realist, I know that sooner or later, I am going to have to wash that thing! Source: Colorado Comments, http://coloradocomments.com/ ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: Automaker Henry Ford asked electrical genius Charlie Steinmetz to build the generators for his factory. One day the generators ground to a halt, and the repairmen couldn't find the problem. So Ford called Steinmetz, who tinkered with the machines for a few hours and then threw the switch. The generators whirred to life - but Ford got a bill for $10,000 from Steinmetz. Flabbergasted, the rather tightfisted car maker inquired why the bill was so high. Steinmetz's reply: For tinkering with the generators, $10. For knowing where to tinker, $9,990. Ford paid the bill. From: Today in the Word, MBI, April, 1990, p. 27 Source: Weekend Encounter, by Dick Innes, Copyright 2003, http://www.actsweb.org/subscribe.htm |