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WITandWISDOM(tm) - May 18, 2004 ISSN 1538-8794 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: This is the miracle that happens every time to those who really love; the more they give, the more they possess. - Rainer Maria Rilke Source: Carol's Thought for Today, http://www.kalama.com/~carola/ ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: A small boy at summer camp received a large package of cookies in the mail from his mother. He ate a few, then placed the remainder under his bed. The next day, after lunch, he went to his tent to get a cookie. The box was gone. That afternoon a camp counselor, who had been told of the theft, saw another boy sitting behind a tree eating the stolen cookies. "That young man," he said to himself, "must be taught not to steal." He returned to the group and sought out the boy whose cookies had been stolen. "Billy," he said, "I know who stole your cookies. Will you help me teach him a lesson?" "Well, yes--but aren't you going to punish him?" asked the puzzled boy. "No, that would only make him resent and hate you," the counselor explained. "I want you to call your mother and ask her to send you another box of cookies." The boy did as the counselor asked and a few days later received another box of cookies in the mail. "Now," said the counselor, "the boy who stole your cookies is down by the lake. Go down there and share your cookies with him." "But," protested the boy, "he's the thief." "I know. But try it -- see what happens." Half an hour later the camp counselor saw the two come up the hill, arm in arm. The boy who had stolen the cookies was earnestly trying to get the other to accept his jackknife in payment for the stolen cookies, and the victim was just as earnestly refusing the gift from his new friend, saying that a few old cookies weren't that important anyway. Source: Life’s Adventures, http://www.worldstart.com/lifesadventures.htm ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: Dilbert Quotes Contest Here are the top ten finalists: 1. "As of tomorrow, employees will only be able to access the building using individual security cards. Pictures will be taken next Wednesday and employees will receive their cards in two weeks." (This was the winning quote created by Fred Dales, Microsoft Corp. in Redmond, WA.) 2. "What I need is an exact list of specific unknown problems we might encounter." (Created by Created by Lykes Lines Shipping) 3. "E-mail is not to be used to pass on information or data. It should be used only for company business." (Created by Accounting manager, Electric Boat Company) 4. "This project is so important, we can't let things that are more important interfere with it." (Created by Advertising/Marketing manager, United Parcel Service) 5. "Doing it right is no excuse for not meeting the schedule." (Created by Plant manager, Delco Corporation) 6. "No one will believe you solved this problem in one day! We've been working on it for months. Now, go act busy for a few weeks and I'll let you know when it's time to tell them." (Created by R&D supervisor, Minnesota Mining and Manufacturing/3M Corp.) 7. Quote from the Boss: "Teamwork is a lot of people doing what I say." (Created by Marketing executive, Citrix Corporation) 8. My sister passed away and her funeral was scheduled for Monday. When I told my Boss, he said she died on purpose so that I would have to miss work on the busiest day of the year. He then asked if we could change her burial to Friday. He said, "That would be better for me." (Created by Shipping executive, FTD Florists) 9. "We know that communication is a problem, but the company is not going to discuss it with the employees." (Created by Switching supervisor, AT&T Long Lines Division) 10. One day my Boss asked me to submit a status report to him concerning a project I was working on. I asked him if tomorrow would be soon enough. He said, "If I wanted it tomorrow, I would have waited until tomorrow to ask for it!" (Created by Hallmark Cards executive) Submitted by Herb ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: Then there was the corporate chief who, while traveling with his wife, pulled their car into a rundown gas station. They discovered that his wife had dated the gas station attendant in high school. "Boy, are you lucky I came along," bragged the husband after they left. "If you had married him, you would be the wife of a gas station attendant." "My dear," replied the wife, "if I had married him, he would be the chief executive officer, and you would be the gas station attendant." Source: Night Light: A Devotional for Couples, By Dobson, James C.; Dobson, Shirley Published by Multnomah Pub (September 1, 2000), ISBN: 1576736741, http://isbn.nu/1576736741 ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: Check out over 1,190 tweaks and tips in 11 categories covering almost every aspect of the Microsoft Windows XP operating system. http://www.tweakxp.com/ Source: The Pocket Newsletter, Copyright ©1996-2004, All Rights Reserved, http://thepocket.com |