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WITandWISDOM(tm) - March 18, 2005 ISSN 1538-8794 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: In our daily lives, we must see that it is not happiness that makes us grateful, but the gratefulness that makes us happy. Source: Quotes of the Day, mailto:rheamo@centurytel.net?subject=Subscribe_Quotes_of_the_Day ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: When Commander Scott Carpenter returned from his orbits of the earth, an engaging parable was unconsciously acted out. Amid the homage of a whole nation heaped upon him with great emotion, his five-year-old daughter, Candace, rushed up to show her father a sore she had acquired on her right elbow during his absence. This was the matter of supreme interest to her. She knew her father would be interested, too; and amid all the excitement and busyness of that moment her father did take time to show interest in his daughter’s elbow! So it is with God, our heavenly Father. His infinite care and concern for His own children extend to the most minute particle and the tiniest detail of our existence. Nothing is permitted to escape His infinite knowledge and control. Source: These Times, Copyright (c) September 1967, Pacific Press, http://www.signstimes.com ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: Older Than Dirt "Hey Dad," one of my kids asked the other day, "What was your favorite fast food when you were growing up?" "We didn't have fast food when I was growing up," I informed him. "All the food was slow." "C'mon, seriously. Where did you eat?" "It was a place called 'at home,'" I explained. "Grandma cooked every day and when Grandpa got home from work, we sat down together at the dining room table, and if I didn't like what she put on my plate I was allowed to sit there until I did like it." By this time, the kid was laughing so hard I was afraid he was going to suffer serious internal damage, so I didn't tell him the part about how I had to have permission to leave the table. But here are some other things I would have told him about my childhood if I figured his system could have handled it: Some parents NEVER owned their own house, wore Levis, set foot on a golf course, traveled out of the country or had a credit card. In their later years they had something called a revolving charge card. The card was good only at Sears Roebuck. Or maybe it was Sears AND Roebuck. Either way, there is no Roebuck anymore. Maybe he died. My parents never drove me to soccer practice. This was mostly because we never had heard of soccer. I had a bicycle that weighed probably 50 pounds, and only had one speed, (slow). We didn't have a television in our house until I was 11, but my grandparents had one before that. It was, of course, black and white, but they bought a piece of colored plastic to cover the screen. The top third was blue, like the sky, and the bottom third was green, like grass. The middle third was red. It was perfect for programs that had scenes of fire trucks riding across someone's lawn on a sunny day. Some people had a lens taped to the front of the TV to make the picture look larger. I was 13 before I tasted my first pizza, it was called "pizza pie." When I bit into it, I burned the roof of my mouth and the cheese slid off, swung down, plastered itself against my chin and burned that, too. It's still the best pizza I ever had. We didn't have a car until I was 15. Before that, the only car in our family was my grandfather's Ford. He called it a "machine." I never had a telephone in my room. The only phone in the house was in the living room and it was on a party line. Before you could dial, you had to listen and make sure some people you didn't know weren't already using the line. Pizzas were not delivered to our home. But milk was. All newspapers were delivered by boys and all boys delivered newspapers. I delivered a newspaper, six days a week. It cost 7 cents a paper, of which I got to keep 2 cents. I had to get up at 4 AM every morning. On Saturday, I had to collect the 42 cents from my customers. My favorite customers were the ones who gave me 50 cents and told me to keep the change. My least favorite customers were the ones who seemed to never be home on collection day. Movie stars kissed with their mouths shut. At least, they did in the movies. Touching someone else's tongue with yours was called French kissing and they didn't do that in movies. I don't know what they did in French movies. French movies were dirty and we weren't allowed to see them. If you grew up in a generation before there was fast food, you may want to share some of these memories with your children or grandchildren. Just don't blame me if they bust a gut laughing. Growing up isn't what it used to be, is it? Submitted by Betty Lou Boyd ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: I was getting into my car when I noticed a dent. On the windshield was a note and a phone number from the driver. "I feel terrible," the woman apologized when I called. "I hit your car as I was pulling into the next parking spot." "Please don't worry," I said to her. "I'm sure our insurance companies will take care of everything." "Thank you for your understanding," she said. "You're so much nicer than the man I hit on my way out." Source: Clean Hewmor, maito:clean-hewmor-subscribe@welovegod.org ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: I haven't tried this one yet, so I don't know if it really works or not.... but it might be worth a try if you're in a pinch! Emergency Car Door Opener Lock the keys in the car? If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys (remote) are home, call home on your cell phone. Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door and have the other person at your home press the unlock button on their remote, holding it near the phone on their end. Your car will unlock. Saves someone from having to drive your keys to you. Distance is no object. You could be hundreds of miles away, and if you can reach someone who has the other "remote" for your car, you can unlock the doors (or the trunk!) Unknown Editor's Note: It works fine! We tried it out and it unlocked our car over a cell phone! Submitted by RP Cly