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WITandWISDOM(tm) - May 13, 2005 ISSN 1538-8794 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he isn't. A sense of humor was provided to console him for what he is. - H Walpole Source: Gentle Humor, mailto:words@netcarrier.com?subject=Subscribe_Gentle_Humor ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: In ancient times a king decided to find and honor the greatest person among his subjects. A man of wealth and property was singled out. Another was praised for his healing powers; another for his wisdom and knowledge of the law. Still another was lauded for his business acumen. Many other successful people were brought back to the palace, and it became evident that the task of choosing the greatest would be difficult. Finally, the last candidate stood before the king. It was a woman. Her hair was white. Her eyes shown with the light of knowledge, understanding, and love. "Who is this?" asked the king. "What has she done?" "You have seen and heard all the others," said the king's aide. "This is their teacher." The people applauded and the king came down from his throne to honor her. Source Unknown Source: The Timothy Report, Copyright (c) 2004 Swan Lake Communications, http://www.timothyreport.com ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: Things you will probably not hear in church: Hey! It's my turn to sit in the front pew. I was so enthralled, I never noticed your sermon went 25 minutes over time. Personally I find this much more enjoyable than golf. I've decided to give our church the $500 a month I used to send to TV evangelists. I volunteer to be the permanent teacher for the junior high Sunday school class. Forget the denominational minimum salary, let's pay our pastor so he can live like we do. I love it when we sing hymns I've never heard before! Since we're all here, let's start the service early. Nothing inspires me and strengthens my commitment like our annual fund-raising campaign! Pastor, we'd like to send you to this Bible seminar in the Bahamas. Source: The Timothy Report, Copyright (c) 2004 Swan Lake Communications, http://www.timothyreport.com ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: I used to go fishing until it struck me: You can buy fish. What am I doing in a boat at four-thirty in the morning? If I want a hamburger, I don't track cattle down. - Kenny Potchenson Source: Hover Dog's Good Jokes, mailto:hooverdogsgoodjokes-subscribe@yahoogroups.com ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: Quick Tip Here's a cool trick for the scroll wheel mouse users out there... if you are in a web browser (Explorer, Firefox, Netscape) or reading an email in Outlook Express, hold down your Ctrl key and spin the wheel. It makes the text larger or smaller depending on which way you spin. For users of the Opera browser, it magnifies both the images and the text. Source: Computer Tips, http://www.worldstart.com/ |
