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WITandWISDOM(tm) - January 20, 2006 ISSN 1538-8794 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: Nobody stands taller than those willing to stand corrected. – William Safire in The New York Times Magazine Source: The Reader's Digest, Copyright © April 2002, All rights reserved., http://www.readersdigest.com/ ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: DEAR ABBY: I heard about teen-age rebellion, but I never experienced it until suddenly Joe, seventeen, and Betsy, fifteen, let me know they were old enough to do as they pleased." Life became one constant battle about hair, clothes, late hours, and poor grades. Taking away privileges and cutting allowances didn't faze them. After I was told for the fiftieth time that they were old enough to do as they pleased, I saw the light. I told them that by their reasoning I was also "old enough to do as I pleased." Then I sat down with a book, put my feet up, and relaxed. When they asked when dinner would be ready, I told them that whenever it pleased them they could make their own dinner. I then made myself a salad and a hamburger and continued to read my book, ignoring them. For five days I never cooked, cleaned, washed nor ironed for them. Only for myself. When they asked what was wrong with me, I told them I was "old enough to do as I pleased, too," and it pleased me to think of no one but myself. They finally got the point. Life is now restored to normal, and now we all live by the rules in this house. This may not work for everyone but it worked for me. Source: Weekend Encounter, by Dick Innes, Copyright (c) ACTS International, 2004, http://www.actsweb.org/subscribe.htm ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: Amazingly Simple Home Remedies If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto. The blockage will be almost instantly removed. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget about the toothache. Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are: You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom. If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You get another chance. If you shop anywhere but Wal-Mart, you are just showing off! Submitted by Orvie Jensen ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: While the family was sitting around the dinner table, Jennifer, 5, turned to her brother Andy, 3, and pointed to her dad. "That's not your real father," she said, startling the whole family. "Yes, he is!" Andy replied. "No, he's not," Jennifer insisted. "God is your heavenly father." Then pointing at her dad, she said, "That's your homely father!" Source: Cybersalt Digest, http://www.cybersalt.org/ ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: Bruce Larson tells this story in his book, "Faith for the Journey." Once there was a successful factory that made drills. One day the owner told his corporate officials that he was going to retire and that he had chosen his son as his successor. At the next board meeting the son asked his four vice presidents, "What are your goals for the company for the next five to ten years?" One vice-president replied, "Well sir, we’re looking at new sizes and shapes for different drills." The son then dropped his bombshell. "I have news for you - there is no market for drills." One could feel the tension in the air. He continued, "From now on we will not think drills. We will not sell drills. We’ll sell holes! People don’t want to buy a drill; they want to make a hole!" As they began to think of other ways to create holes they developed, among other methods, lasers for hole drilling. This attitude change and other innovations keep this company in business while its competitors lost large shares of the market and some even went bankrupt. Brent Porterfield Source: Illustrations, http://www.cybersaltlists.org