WITandWISDOM™ - E-zine

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WITandWISDOM(tm) - January 25, 2007
ISSN 1538-8794

~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS:

There is a curve called failure, a loop called confusion, speed bumps called friends, caution lights called family, and you will have flats called jobs.

But, if you have a spare called determination, an engine called perseverance, insurance called faith, and a driver called God, you will make it to a place called success!

Submitted by Lorraine

~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS:

Years ago in Scotland, the Clark family had a dream. The Clarks had worked and saved, making plans for their nine children and themselves to travel to the United States. It had taken years, but they had finally saved enough money and had gotten passports and reservations for the whole family on a new liner to the United States. The entire family was filled with anticipation and excitement about their new life.

However, seven days before their departure, the youngest son was bitten by a dog. The doctor sewed up the boy but hung a yellow sheet on the Clarks' front door. Because of the possibility of rabies, they were being quarantined for 14 days. The family's dreams were dashed. They would not be able to make the trip to America as they had planned.

The father, filled with disappointment and anger, stomped to the dock to watch the ship leave. The father shed tears of disappointment and cursed both his son and God for their misfortune.

Five days later, the tragic news spread throughout Scotland -- the mighty Titanic had sunk. The Clark family was to have been on that ship, but because the son had been bitten by a dog, they were left behind in Scotland. When Mr. Clark heard the news, he hugged his son and thanked him for saving the family. He thanked God for saving their lives and turning what he had felt was a tragedy into a blessing.

Source: Laugh & Lift, http://www.laughandlift.com/list.html

~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT:

One of my former employees took a job as the operations coordinator for a manufacturer of handcrafted hardwood rockers. During the time in which he was under my employ, we became good friends and, since then, we have managed to keep in touch from time to time. He was known to be the instigator of many a humorous practical joke and I did my best to retaliate whenever the opportunity presented itself.

Recently, my friend contacted me in order to get my mailing address so he could send me some of his company brochures so that I could see what it is that he is coordinating. In talking with him, it is obvious that he takes pride in what he is doing and I am honored that he thinks enough of me to share that aspect of his life.

A couple of days after we spoke, I received a package from him. It contained several brochures, a few logo emblazoned plastic pens, a couple of really nice laser engraved wooden pens and a couple of penlights complete with his company logo. I had barely finished examining the contents when my friend called to ask if his package had arrived. I told him that it had and thanked him for the very nice items that he had sent. After hanging up the telephone, I felt that I hadn't said enough about the gifts he'd sent so I emailed the following message to him:

Dear Mr. Sasser,

This is to let you know that your lovely gifts have arrived. The attractive wooden pen is great and I plan to use it as soon as I get the splinters from it out of my hand. I have burned the retina of my left eye from staring at the beam from the handsome penlight you sent but I'm sure it will prove useful if my vision ever returns. My doctor says that a simple skin graft will repair the third degree burns caused by the penlights leaking battery. Even though I have had a severe allergic reaction to the ink from the high quality plastic pens you sent, I'm sure with the proper antihistamine, I'll be able to use them without incident.

I have had a chance to look at the colorful brochure of your product line but don't worry as I probably won't get an infection from the paper cuts it produced. Since we have been forced to cut back on supplies due to budget restraints, I have deposited your brochures in the restrooms since toilet paper is now a rare commodity here. I'm sure my fellow employees will be very appreciative of your generous contribution and you should pick up some business from them as they browse the catalog when tearing pages from it.

Thanks again and best regards,

Robeo

Copyright 2007 Robert Byron
All Rights Reserved

Source: The Lame Humor List, http://absoluterobeo.com

~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING:

Comedian Robin Williams observes, "In England, if you commit a crime, the police don't have a gun and you don't have a gun. If you commit a crime, the police will say 'Stop, or I'll say stop again.'"

Source: Preaching Now, http://www.preaching.com/newsletter/subscribe.html

~~~~~~~ TRIVIA:

New Online Tool for Church Websites

"Does your church's website communicate to outsiders as well as to the members?" asks a new web resource. A church site is the congregation's 'shop window' to its community. To fulfill this function well, it must be enticing, people-centered and easily understandable by outsiders. Unfortunately, many churches are unsure how to achieve this vital mix.

So the Internet Evangelism Day team has produced an online self-assessment tool. It leads a church through a series of questions, to highlight areas of their website which may need development:

http://www.InternetEvangelismDay.com/design

Submitted by Tony Whittaker


WITandWISDOM™ - E-zine