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WITandWISDOM(tm) - April 9, 2001

~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS:

"Life is a long lesson in humility." - Sir James M. Barrie

Source: Awesome Quotes, www.coolnewsletters.com



"The most memorable present I ever received was a box of chocolates from someone with a note attached that said, 'Thanks for your spirit of hope and optimism.' I still don't know who sent it." - Walter B.

If you want to enrich your life - and the life of someone else - extend your love anonymously.

Take a few moments today to spread some happiness, but no one must ever know you did it. Here are some examples:

Send a former teacher some flowers with a note that says, "It's been a long time since I had you for a teacher. But I just wanted to say 'Thanks' for the contribution you have made to my life."

Put some money in an envelope and have someone give it to a family who is in need. Your note might say, "I thought this might come in handy. Someone who cares."

Run an ad in the local paper that reads, "We think John Doe (or whoever) is the greatest."

Put your imagination to work. Then do it. But don't even tell your closest friend. You'll cherish the experience.

By Neil Eskelin in Neil Eskelin's Daily Jump Start(tm), Copyright (c) 2000, www.neileskelin.com

~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT:

Part 2 of 2 [Mar 28, Apr 9]

Kids say the strangest things. Some grade school teachers must agree with that, because they keep journals of amusing things their students have written in papers. Here are a few examples:

One of the main causes of dust is janitors.

A scout obeys all to who obedience is due and respects all duly constipated authorities.

One by product of raising cattle is calves.

To prevent head colds, use an agonizer to spray into the nose until it drips into the throat.

The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard, and vinegar.

The climate is hottest next to the Creator.

Oliver Cromwell had a large, red nose, but under it were deeply religious feelings.

The word trousers is an uncommon noun because it is singular at the top and plural at the bottom.

Syntax is all the money collected in church from sinners.

The blood circulates through the body by flowing down one leg and up the other.

In spring, the salmon swim upstream to spoon.

Iron was discovered because somebody smelt it.

A person should take a bath once in the summer, not so often in the winter.

Submitted by Walt Groff



Gerard Ropuille of Claremont, France, blew up his house with his washing machine. Ropuille told police that he was trying to remove a grease stain from his shirt when he poured a cup of gasoline in the washer. When the machine changed cycles, a spark ignited the gas and blew out the first floor of his home. Gerard was quoted as saying, "I feel a bit stupid."

From: The Oregonian, Copyright (c) December 12, 2000, www.oregonlive.com/oregonian/obuffer.ssf

Submitted by: Barbara Henry

~~~~~~~ TRIVIA:

Exactly what does it mean to have 20/20 vision?

So many of us are like sheep, accepting this measurement without asking what it means. Do you see my point? If not, put your glasses on or step a little closer.

Actually that's the crux of the matter. The numbers refer to how far away you have to be to read letters on a chart. The particular number 20 is a reference point, the distance a person with normal vision would have to be to read a line on an eye chart. If you have 20/40 vision in one eye, for example (each of your eyes may have different vision) you would need to stand 20 feet from the chart to read print that someone with normal vision could read from 40 feet away.

By the way, whoever writes those charts surely needs glasses. Otherwise why would they write such gibberish?

From: HOW A FLY WALKS UPSIDE DOWN by Martin M. Goldwyn

Source: MailBits.com Trivia, Copyright (c) 1998-2001. All rights reserved. Trivia-subscribe@mailbits.com

WITandWISDOM™ Copyright © 1998-2001 by Richard G. Wimer - All Rights Reserved
Any questions, comments or suggestions may be sent to Richard G. Wimer.