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WITandWISDOM(tm) - October 9, 2002
In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream always wins - not through strength but by perseverance. - H. Jackson Brown
Source: Inspire, http://www.inspirelist.com/
~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS:
A much loved-minister of God once carried a secret burden of long-past sin deep in his heart. He had committed the sin many years before, during his Bible school training. No one knew what he had done, but they did know he had repented. Even so, he had suffered years of remorse over the incident without any sense of God's forgiveness.
A woman in his church deeply loved God and claimed to have visions in which Jesus Christ spoke to her. The minister, skeptical of her claims, asked her, "The next time you speak to the Lord, would you please ask Him what sin your minister committed while he was in Bible school." The woman kindly agreed.
When she came to the church a few days later the minister asked, "Did He visit you?"
She said, "Yes."
"And did you ask Him what sin I committed?"
"Yes, I asked Him," she replied
"Well, what did He say?"
"He said, 'I don't remember.'"
Submitted by Umali Nenette
~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT:
THOUGHTS ON HOUSEKEEPING
Vacuuming too often weakens the carpet fibers. Say this with a serious face, and shudder delicately whenever anyone mentions Carpet Fresh.
Dust bunnies cannot evolve into dust rhinos when disturbed. Rename the area under the couch "The Galapagos Islands" and claim an ecological exemption.
Layers of dirty film on windows and screens provide a helpful filter against harmful and aging rays from the sun. Call it an SPF factor of 5 and leave it alone.
Cobwebs artfully draped over lampshades reduces the glare from the bulb, thereby creating a romantic atmosphere. If your husband points out that the light fixtures need dusting, simply look affronted and exclaim, "What? And spoil the mood?"
Explain the mound of pet hair brushed up against the doorways by claiming you are collecting it there to use for stuffing handsewn play animals for underprivileged children.
If unexpected company is coming, pile everything unsightly into one room and close the door. As you show your guests through your tidy home, rattle the door knob vigorously, fake a growl and say, "I'd love you to see our Den, but Fluffy hates to be disturbed and the shots are SO expensive."
Mix one-quarter cup pine-scented household cleaner with four cups of water in a spray bottle. Mist the air lightly. Leave dampened rags in conspicuous locations. Develop an exhausted look, throw yourself onto the couch, and sigh, "I clean and I clean and I still don't get anywhere..."
Source: Marty's Joke of the Day, http://www.geocities.com/martysjotd
~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING:
Observing jury selection in our county courthouse one day, I was amused by one prospective juror. An attorney asked her, "Have you ever been falsely accused of speeding?"
"No, sir," replied the woman. "I'm always guilty."
Contributed to Reader's Digest "All In a Day's Work" by Ethan Home
Source: DailyInBox: Reader's Digest CyberSmiles, http://dailyinbox.com/rd/
The Game of Battleship
Source: Bud's Links, mailto:BUD770@aol.com?subject=join_BUDS_Links