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WITandWISDOM(tm) - May 14, 2003
ISSN 1538-8794

~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS:

Age 83: I've learned that I don't feel my age as long as I focus on my dreams instead of my regrets.

Source: The Complete Live and Learn and Pass It On, By Brown, H. Jackson, Published by Thomas Nelson (Mar 1, 1998), ISBN: 1558535829, http://isbn.nu/1558535829

Submitted by Elisa Wimer


~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT:

Dog Letters to God

Dear God:
How come people love to smell flowers, but seldom smell one another? Where are their priorities?

Dear God,
When we get to Heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it the same old story?

Dear God,
Excuse me, but why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not one named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We dogs love a nice ride! I know every breed cannot have its own model, but it would be easy to rename the Chrysler Eagle the Chrysler Beagle!

Dear God,
If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?

Dear God,
Is it true that in Heaven, dining room tables have on-ramps?

Dear God,
More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

Dear God,
When we get to the Pearly Gates, do we have to shake hands to get in?

Dear God,
We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent IDs, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God,
Are there dogs on other planets or are we alone? I have been howling at the moon and stars for a long time, but all I ever hear back is the beagle across the street!

Dear God,
Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?

Dear God,
Is it true that dogs are not allowed in restaurants because we can't make up our minds what NOT to order? Or is it the carpets thing, again?

Dear God,
Can you undo what that doctor did?

Cat Letter to God
Dear God,
Do you exist? I'm just curious. I don't care.

Source: Scream of the Crop, mailto:scream_of_the_crop-subscribe@egroups.com


A policeman saw a man dressed in full cowboy garb -- hat, chaps, duster, six-shooters, boots and spurs -- standing on a street corner in a busy city. He approached the cowboy and asked him his name.

"Call me Tex!" was the cowboy's reply.

"Well, Tex, where are you from, Texas?" the policeman asked.

"Nah, I'm from Louisiana, but I couldn't very well have you call me Louise!"

Source: Clean Laugh, http://www.cybersalt.org/lists.htm

~~~~~~~ TRIVIA:

Men, Do you shave every day?

A recent study in the American Journal of Epidemiology shows that men who don't shave every day are 70 percent more likely to have a stroke than daily shavers. The researchers suspect it's because scruffy guys tend to smoke and have less healthy lifestyles, but they are not discounting a possible hormonal link.

Source: Health, April 2003, http://www.health.com

WITandWISDOM™ ISSN 1538-8794 - Copyright © 1998-2003 by Richard G. Wimer - All Rights Reserved
Any questions, comments or suggestions may be sent to Richard G. Wimer.