WITandWISDOM™ - E-zine

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WITandWISDOM(tm) - December 20, 2006
ISSN 1538-8794

~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS:

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other. - Burton Hillis

Source: Carol's Thought for Today, http://users.adelphia.net/~mrs.carol


It was almost Christmas as the young boy went into the pet shop looking for a puppy. The owner showed him a litter in a box and the boy picked up each one looking, examining them and putting each back in the box. After several minutes he walked back up to the owner and said, "I picked one out, how much will it cost?" The man gave him the price, and the boy promised to be back in a few days with the money. "Don't take too long." the owner cautioned, "Puppies like these sell quickly."

The boy turned and smiled knowingly, "I'm not worried," he said, "Mine will still be here." The boy went to work, cleaning, doing jobs and saved his money. When he had enough for the puppy, he returned to the store.

He walked up to the counter and laid down a pocket full of wadded bills. The store owner sorted and counted the cash. After verifying the amount, he smiled at the boy and said, "All right, son, you can get your puppy."

The boy reached into the back of the box, pulled out a skinny dog with a limp leg, and started to leave. The owner stopped him. "Don't take that puppy," he objected, "He's crippled. He can't play. Heíll never run with you. He can't fetch. Get one of the healthy pups." "No thank you, sir," the boy replied. This is exactly the kind of dog Iíve been looking for."

As the boy turned to leave, the store owner started to speak, but remained silent. Suddenly, he understood. For extending from the bottom of the boy's trousers was a brace - a brace for his crippled leg.

By Max Lucado

Submitted by Larry Reed

~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT:

If I were ol' Santa

If I were ol' Santa, you know what I'd do;
I'd dump silly gifts that are given to you,
and deliver some things just inside your front door,
things you have lost, but treasured before.

I'd give you back all your maidenly vigor,
and to go along with it, a neat tiny figure.
Then restore the old color that once graced your hair,
before rinses and bleaches took residence there.

I'd bring back the shape with which you were gifted,
so things now suspended need not be uplifted.
I'd draw in your tummy and smooth down your back
until you'd be a dream in those tight fitting slacks.

I'd remove all your wrinkles and leave only one chin,
so you wouldn't spend hours rubbing grease on your skin.
You'd never have flashes or queer dizzy spells
and you wouldn't hear noises like ringing of bells.

No sore aching feet and no corns on your toes;
no searching for spectacles when they're right on your nose.
Not a shot would you take in your arm, hip or fanny
from a doctor who thinks you're a nervous old granny.

You'd never have a headache, so no pills would you take
and no heating pad needed since your muscles won't ache.
Yes, if I were Santa, you'd never look stupid.
You'd be a cute little chick with the romance of cupid.

I'd give a lift to your heart when those wolves start to whistle
and the joys of your heart would be light as a thistle.
But alas! I'm not Santa. I'm simply just me;
the matronliest of matrons you ever did see.

I wish I could tell you all the symptoms I've got,
but I'm due at my doctor's for an estrogen shot.
Even though we've grown older this wish is sincere;
Merry Christmas to you and a Happy New Year.

Submitted by Debbie


A teacher was explaining subtraction to the kids in her class. 'You have 10 fingers. If you take away three, what would you have?'

Little Timmy spoke up, 'No music lessons.'

~~~~~~~ TRIVIA:

Was playing the organ in Bach's blood?

It would seem so -- More than 100 descendants of Johann Sebastian Bach have been cathedral organists.

Source: ArcaMax - Trivia, http://tinyurl.com/9kf44

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