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WITandWISDOM(tm) - November 2, 1999 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: Autumn is a second spring when every leaf's a flower. - Albert Camus (E-zine: WISDOM SEEKERS Mailto:wisdomseekers- subscribe@onelist.com) ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: On my way to work as a maintenance instructor for United Airlines, I often stop at a doughnut shop and get doughnuts for my students. There is usually a "street person" hanging around asking for change. Sometimes I give him some, but usually I ignore him. One day when I didn't have a class, I saw him and felt impressed to stop. We ended up sharing a hot drink, apple fritters, and conversation on a bus stop bench. When I asked him if I could pray for him, he said, "I don't need anybody to pray for me; I just need somebody to talk to that will treat me like a human being." - Clyde Best, Jr., Redwood City, California He certainly needed prayers but he also needed evidence of a vital prayer life which is loving action. - Richard Wimer :o) ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: THE SECRET GUIDE Part 1 of 2 [Nov 2 & 12] Here it is, the secret chart used by bachelors worldwide, because they don't have wives who can recognize on sight (and sometimes before) when the Big Mac has become one with the special sauce. FREEZER FOODS: Ice Cream - If you can't tell the difference between your ice cubes and your ice cream, it's time to throw BOTH out. Frozen Foods - Frozen foods that have become an integral part of the defrosting problem in your freezer compartment will probably be spoiled (or wrecked anyway) by the time you pry them out with a kitchen knife. IN THE FRIDGE: Eggs - When something starts pecking its way out of the shell, the egg is probably past its prime. Dairy Products - Milk is spoiled when it starts to look like yogurt. Yogurt is spoiled when it starts to look like cottage cheese. Cottage cheese is spoiled when it starts to look like regular cheese. Regular cheese is nothing but spoiled milk anyway - if you can dig down and still find something non-green, bon appetite! Meat - If opening the refrigerator door causes stray animals from a three-block radius to congregate outside your house, toss the meat. Unmarked Items: You know it is well beyond prime when you're tempted to discard the Tupperware along with the food. EMPTY General Rule of Thumb - Most food cannot be kept longer than the average life span of a hamster. Keep a hamster in your refrigerator to gauge this. The Gag Test - Anything that makes you gag is spoiled (except for leftovers from what you cooked for yourself last night). Expiration Dates: This is not a marketing ploy to encourage you to throw away perfectly good food so that you'll spend more on groceries. Even dry foods older than you are may be ready to replace. Perhaps you'd benefit by having a calendar in your kitchen. (E-zine: JOKES EVERY DAY Mailto:jokesubscribe@jokeseveryday.com) ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: Do you know the story of the wedding guest, a friend of the bride, who was not able to attend so sent a card of greeting which was read at the reception after the ceremony. It should have included the reference 1 John 4:18 - "There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear". However the "1" was omitted. So a Bible was fetched and the Best Man read out the verse on the card - John 4:18 "The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband". (Steve Williams via E-zine: MONDAY FODDER Mailto:dgaufaaa@iohk.com?subject=Subscribe_Monday_Fodder) ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: ENCYCLOPAEDIA BRITANNICA'S NEW WEB SITE CHICAGO (Reuters. Oct. 20, 1999) Encyclopaedia Britannica's new Web site features the entire contents of the reference work. The site includes the contents of the 32-volume Encyclopaedia, up-to-date news from the Washington Post, magazine articles and historical information, as well as the paid advertisements that the 231-year-old Britannica hopes to profit from. The company, which says only 100,000 people have managed to reach the site's first page, admits it underestimated the early public response. http://www.Britannica.com/ The Chicago-based company still plans to publish a new, printed 40-volume set of its leather-bound reference work, but the days of door-to-door salesmen promoting the set as a portal of knowledge to working-class families entered a new phase on Tuesday when Britannica unveiled its site. Britannica's first edition was issued in 100 parts from 1768 to 1771 in Edinburgh, Scotland, and it calls itself the "oldest continuously published reference work in the English language.'' (Netscape Netcenter) |