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WITandWISDOM(tm) - September 22, 2000 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: An artist is anyone who takes pride in doing a job well. - Author Unknown Source: Bits & Pieces, June 22, 1995, Copyright (c) Economic Press, Inc., www.epinc.com/ via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: TEN TOP THINGS THAT MAKE A REAL MAN: 10. Comes home directly from work knowing his "real" job is about to start. 9. Is not afraid to get down on hands and knees and play "horsie". 8. Kisses his children and shows them a man can be gentle. 7. Kisses his wife in front of his children so the children can be secure in the knowledge of a united home. 6. Hugs his family and says "I love you." 5. Is not afraid to cry. 4. Goes with his family to church. 3. Values the advice of his wife. 2. Starts each day with a "quiet time", talking to the Lord. And the number one thing: 1. Prays By Jan, co-editor; Words For Life Source: The Funnies, andychaps_the-funnies-subscribe@egroups.com via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: STATEMENTS FOUND ON INSURANCE FORMS Part 2 of 2 [Sep 12, 22] As I approached an intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident. To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front I struck a pedestrian. My car was legally parked as it backed into another vehicle. An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished. I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat found that I had a fractured skull. The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth. I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows. The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of the way when I struck the front end. Submitted by Udi Latarre ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: "I have to have a raise," the man said to his boss. "There are three other companies after me." "Is that so?" asked the manager. "What other companies are after you?" "The electric company, the telephone company, and the gas company." Source: Mindconnection www.mindconnection.com/jokes.htm via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: Sentences that say the same thing forward and backward are called palindromes. Here's still another one: "Madam in Eden, I'm Adam." Submitted by Rootsaway via http://www.witandwisdom.org |