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WITandWISDOM(tm) - September 25, 2000 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: "Grief knits two hearts in closer bonds than happiness ever can; and common sufferings are far stronger links than common joys." -- Alphonse Marie Louis de Lamartine Source: Inspiration A Day!, inspiration_a_day- subscribe@listbot.com via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: GOD CREATED THE FIRST TEACHER On the 6th day, God created men and women. On the 7th day, he rested. Not so much to recuperate, but rather to prepare himself for the work he was going to do on the next day. For it was on that day-the 8th day-that God created the FIRST TEACHER. This TEACHER, though taken from among men and women, had several significant modifications. In general, God made the TEACHER more durable than other men and women. The TEACHER was made to arise at a very early hour and to go to bed no earlier than 11:30 p.m .- with no rest in between. The TEACHER had to be able to withstand being locked up in an air-tight classroom for six hours with thirty-five "monsters" on a rainy Monday. And the TEACHER had to be fit to correct 103 term papers over Easter vacation. Yes, God made the TEACHER tough...but gentle too. The TEACHER was equipped with soft hands to wipe away the tears of the neglected and lonely student...of those of the sixteen year old girl who was not asked to the prom. And into the TEACHER God poured a generous amount of patience. Patience when a student asks to repeat the directions the TEACHER has just repeated for someone else. Patience when the kids forget their lunch money for the fourth day in a row. Patience when one-third of the class fails the test. Patience when the text books haven't arrived yet, and the semester starts tomorrow. And God gave the TEACHER a heart slightly bigger than the average human heart. For the TEACHER's heart had to be big enough to love the kid who screams, "I hate this class-it's boring!" and to love the kid who runs out of the classroom at the end of the period without so much as a"goodbye", let alone a "thank you". And lastly, God gave the TEACHER an abundant supply of HOPE. For God knew that the TEACHER would always be hoping. Hoping that the kids would someday learn how to spell... hoping not to have lunchroom duty... hoping that Friday would come... hoping for a free day.... hoping for deliverance. When God finished creating the TEACHER, he stepped back and admired the work of his hands. And God saw that the TEACHER was good. Very Good! And God smiled, for when he looked at the TEACHER, he saw into the future. He knew that the future is in the hands of the TEACHERS. And because God loves Teachers so much, on the 9th day God created "Snow Days." - Author Unknown Source: Gracemail, gracemail-subscribe@egroups.com via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: SILICON VALLEY SLANG Author Unknown WOMBAT: Stands for "Waste of Money, Brains and Time". Code 18: An error made by the user. Refers to the 18 inches that separate a user's face from the computer display. LASAGNA SYNDROME: Writing a piece of software with so many overlapping dialog boxes that it's nearly impossible to complete a task. NERD BIRD: Any weekday direct airline flight between another U.S. city and San Jose, California. These flights are typically over-populated with engineers and technical types, so a good amount of job seeking and rumor-milling occurs during each run. WALDO: A demo given with great showmanship for a product with little innovation or creativity. TRIORITY: The three things your manager would have you do at once. TEAM PLAYER: An engineer with no backbone who says "yes" to everything. Can also mean someone who gets in early and makes coffee for everyone else. The latter definition is definitely more desirable. THINK TIME: This is what operators make use of when they get an "idle event". This most normally occurs during a long compile or a slow network connection. SNEAKERNET: When data is transferred between workstations by copying it to a floppy and walking it to the intended workstation instead of using the LAN. Source: The Funnies, andychaps_the-funnies-subscribe@egroups.com via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: There was a policeman sitting in a great hiding place, behind a billboard one day, waiting for his speeder. He waited several hours and no one came zipping by. His patience was soon rewarded, however, when a young man flew by in his sports car. The policeman pulled him over, sauntered up to the driver's window, and with a flashy smile said, "Son, I've been waiting for you all day!" Without hesitating, the young man answered, "I got here as quick as I could sir!" After laughing himself silly, the policeman let him go! Source: Monday Fodder dgaufaaa@iohk.com?subject=Subscribe_Monday_Fodder via http://www.witandwisdom.org ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: Sisters-in-law Sheila and Rhonda Preissler of Ohio are married to brothers and -- by an ironic twist of fate -- both suffer from chronic kidney disease. But that's not the only twist. Both are getting new kidneys -- from their husbands. Doctors operated on Sheila and Kevin Preissler, both 42, and in November will perform surgery on Preissler's younger brother, Tim, 33, and his wife Rhonda. Kevin discovered in March he was a match for Sheila after she was unsuccessful in finding a donor from her biological family. After that, Rhonda told Tim she didn't want him to feel obligated to get tested. "I just figured I would try," Tim told the Columbus Dispatch. The brothers say they are just giving their wives a chance to go on with life. Copyright 2000 by United Press International, All rights reserved. Source: WeirdNews from ArcaMax, Copyright (c) 2000, www.arcamax.com/cgi-bin/subscribe.pl via http://www.witandwisdom.org |