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WITandWISDOM(tm) - August 28, 2003 ISSN 1538-8794 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: "Planning is a real waste of time . . . for those who waste time." - Doug Firebaugh Source: The Funnies, http://groups.yahoo.com/group/andychaps_the-funnies ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: "When my son was a small boy playing with his buddies in the back yard, I overheard them talking one day – and the conversation was, amusingly, one of those ‘My dad can whip your dad' routines. "I heard one boy proudly say, ‘My dad knows the mayor of our town!' Then I heard another say, ‘That's nothing – my dad knows the governor of our state!" Wondering what was coming next in the ‘program of bragging,' I presently heard a wonderfully familiar voice (that of my own little son), saying, ‘That's nothing – my dad knows God!" "I swiftly slipped away from my place of eavesdropping with tears running down my cheeks. I dropped on my knees in my room and prayed earnestly and gratefully, ‘Oh, God, I pray that my boy will always be able to say, "My dad knows God." Source: Chapnotes, http://www.chaplainsnotes.org/ ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: Some Camping Tips . . . . by Bruce Cochran Part 2 of 2 [Aug 27 & 28] You can compress the diameter of your rolled up sleeping bag by running over it with your car. Take this simple test to see if you qualify for solo camping. Shine a flashlight into one ear. If the beam shines out the other ear, do not go into the woods alone. A two-man pup tent does not include two men or a pup. A potato baked in the coals for one hour makes an excellent side dish. A potato baked in the coals for three hours makes an excellent hockey puck. In emergency situations, you can survive in the wilderness by shooting small game with a slingshot made from the elastic waistband of your underwear. The guitar of the noisy teenager at the next campsite makes excellent kindling. A large carp can be used for a pillow. Check the washing instructions before purchasing any apparel to be warn camping. Buy only those that read "Beat on a rock in stream." The sight of a bald eagle has thrilled campers for generations. The sight of a bald man, however, does absolutely nothing for the eagle. It's entirely possible to spend your whole vacation on a winding mountain road behind a large motor home. Effective January 1, 1998, you will actually have to enlist in the Swiss Army to get a Swiss Army Knife. Bear bells provide an element of safety for hikers in grizzly country. The tricky part is getting them on the bears. From the Sept. ‘96 issue of Backpacker Source: Kitty's Daily Mews, Copyright (c) 1997-2003, Compilation Rights, http://www.katscratch.com/ ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: I was trying to get my seventh-grade history class to understand how the Indians must have felt when they first encountered the Spanish explorers. "How would you feel," I asked, "if someone showed up on your doorstep who looked very different, spoke a strange language and wore unusual clothes? Wouldn't you be a bit scared?" "Nah," one boy answered, "I'd just figure it was my sister's date." Source: Clean Laugh, http://www.cybersalt.org/lists.htm ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: Have you ever upgraded to a new version of software and absolutely hated it? Have an older computer that won't run the latest and greatest? It's so frustrating because you usually can't go back to the old version. Now maybe you can! Today's cool site has over 300 versions of 44 popular programs. Choose from a variety of programs such as AOL Instant Messenger, Internet Explorer, Acrobat Reader and more! But if there is an older program that you like and it's not here, do what I do. Search eBay, the auction site. It's bound to be for sale there! To visit this site: http://www.oldversion.com/ Copyright 2003, The Kim Komando Show. All rights reserved. Source: Kim Komando's Cool Site of the Day, http://www.komando.com/newsletter.asp |