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WITandWISDOM(tm) - February 16, 2007
Never undertake anything for which you would not have the courage to ask the blessings of Heaven.
Submitted by Elaine
~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS:
A widely respected man known as "Uncle Johnson" died in Michigan at the incredible age of 120. Perhaps his advanced years could be credited in part to the cheerful outlook that characterized his life.
One day while at work in his garden, he was singing songs of praise to God. His pastor, who was passing by, looked over the fence and called, "Uncle Johnson, you seem very happy today."
"Yes, I was just thinking," said the old man.
"Thinking about what?" questioned his pastor.
"Oh, I was just thinking that if the crumbs of joy that fall from the Master's table in this world are so good, what will the great loaf in glory be like! I tell you, sir, there will be enough for everyone and some to spare up there."
Source: The Timothy Report, Copyright (c) 2004 Swan Lake Communications, http://www.timothyreport.com
Submitted by William Schnippert
~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT:
The Living Lexicon: Church Terms That Oughta Be
Biblidue: The build-up of bookmarks, bulletins, notes, and other miscellanea that collects in one's Bible.
Clivaholic: One who can no longer control the compulsion to quote C.S. Lewis in every sermon, lesson, or conversation.
Hymnastics: The entertaining body language of the song leader.
Narthexegesis: Unsolicited post-sermon commentary given the preacher by armchair biblical theologians.
Pewtrify: To occupy a precise spot in the sanctuary for more than 15 years without once showing signs of sentient life.
Ministereotype: A common myth or misconception about any ordained person.
Deaconscript: An unwilling church officer cajoled into a position of leadership.
Hi-litaholic: One who cannot resist highlighting Bible verses until the entire volume is a multihued mass of Day-Glo vibrancy.
Hymnprovisation: The abrupt and unannounced transition from one song to another, usually a chorus unfamiliar to most present.
By Rob Suggs in Leadership, Vol. 10, no. 2.
Source: Monday Fodder by Dave Aufrance, Missionary in Hongkong
~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING:
During the summer I was the assistant activities director at the senior citizens home in our town. On my last day before returning to school, I took my seven-year-old niece with me to visit some of the residents. After saying our good-byes to everyone, Janice and I left. As we were walking to the car, she looked up at me and exclaimed, "So that's where all the grandmas hang out!"
Submitted by Lorraine
No Softies In Canada's Pillow Fight League
TORONTO (Reuters 01-16-07) - Toronto's College Street bar district has seen its share of late-night fights, but a recent scrap was a bit out of the ordinary, as a financial journalist in a '50s housewife get-up tried to wallop the daylights out of a 35-year-old part-time waitress -- using a pillow.
The crowd of nearly 500 did little to interfere, as they had paid to be there.
Welcome to the Pillow Fight League, which has been drawing growing crowds in Toronto since it formed early last year, and is now set to export its campy fun to New York City.
Submitted by Kiri