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WIT & WISDOM - January 19, 1999 ~~~~~~~ THOUGHTS: No one is useless in the world who lightens the burden of it to anyone else. - Charles Dickens [1] ~~~~~~~ SPECIAL THOUGHTS: There is a marvelous story of a man who once stood before God, his heart breaking from the pain and injustice in the world. "Dear God," he cried out, "look at all the suffering , the anguish and distress in the world. Why don't you send help?" God responded, "I did send help. I sent you" When we tell our children that story, we must tell them that each one of them was sent to help repair the broken world-and that it is not the task of an instant or of a year, but of a lifetime. -Teaching Your Children About God (Henry Holt) Source-Readers' Digest; October 1997 [2] ~~~~~~~ THIS & THAT: THE DANGER OF EATING BREAD :o) A recent newspaper headline read, "Smell of baked bread may be health hazard." The article went on to describe the dangers of the smell of baking bread. The main danger, apparently, is that the organic components of this aroma may break down ozone. I was horrified. When are we going to do something about bread-induced global warming? Sure, we attack tobacco companies, but when is the government going to go after Big Bread? Well, I've done a little research, and what I've discovered should make anyone think twice. . . . THE FINDINGS 1. More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread eaters. 2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests. 3. In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever and influenza ravaged whole nations. 4. More than 90 percent of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours of eating bread. 5. Bread is made from a substance called "dough." It has been proven that as little as one pound of dough can be used to suffocate a mouse. The average person eats more bread than that in one month! 6. Bread has been proven to be addictive. Subjects deprived of bread and given only water to eat begged for bread after only two days. [3] ~~~~~~~ KEEP SMILING: First girl: "My pastor said we could have 16 husbands." Second girl: "Are you sure?" First girl: "Yes. At the last wedding at the church I heard him say, four better, four worse, four richer and four poorer." [4] ~~~~~~~ TRIVIA: Do you like the smell of Chanel No. 5? What happened to Chanel numbers 1 through 4? . . . . When designer Gabrielle "Coco" Chanel introduced her first perfume in 1921, she gave it the enigmatic name "Chanel No. 5," leaving people to wonder what happened to the first four Chanels. According to Chanel, she jumped straight to number five because it was her lucky number. To add luck to the fragrance, she introduced it on the fifth day of May, the fifth month. Apparently all that luck paid off. Chanel No. 5 became the world's best selling perfume. Main Source: THE BOOK OF ANSWERS by Barbara Berliner [5] ~~~~~~~ CONTRIBUTORS: [1] (E-zine: THIS AND THAT Mailto:milady@mediaone.net) [2] (Timothy Cabrera) [3] (Keith Marshall via E- zine: BILL'S PUNCH LINE [4] (Ed Zinn via E-zine: MONDAY FODDER Mailto:dgaufaaa@iohk.com) [5] (E-zine: MAILBITS.COM http://www.MailBits.com/Trivia) |